Friday, January 04, 2008
The best medicine.
"This is the food of paradise.... Euphoria and brilliant storms of laughter; ecstatic reveries and extensions of one's personality on several simultaneous planes are to be completely expected."
- "Haschich Fudge" from The Alice B. Toklas Cookbook
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Troubatrixes.
"Handsome friend, charming and kind,
when shall I have you in my power?
If only I could lie beside you for an hour
and embrace you lovingly
know this, I'd give almost anything
to have you in my husband's place,
but only under the condition
that you swear to do my bidding."
when shall I have you in my power?
If only I could lie beside you for an hour
and embrace you lovingly
know this, I'd give almost anything
to have you in my husband's place,
but only under the condition
that you swear to do my bidding."
- Countess Dia
Best friends.
"the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn."
- Jack Keroac
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Surrender.
I know you think that
I shouldn't still love you,
Or tell you that.
But if I didn't say it,
Well I'd still have felt it.
Where's the sense in that?
I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were.
I will go down with this ship,
And I won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door.
I'm in love and always will be.
I know I left too much mess and
destruction to come back again,
And I caused nothing but trouble.
I understand if you can't talk to me again,
And if you live by the rules of "it's over"
then I'm sure that that makes sense.
I will go down with this ship,
And I won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door.
I'm in love and always will be.
And when we meet,
Which I'm sure we will,
All that was there
Will be there still.
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue.
And you will think
That I've moved on.
I shouldn't still love you,
Or tell you that.
But if I didn't say it,
Well I'd still have felt it.
Where's the sense in that?
I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were.
I will go down with this ship,
And I won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door.
I'm in love and always will be.
I know I left too much mess and
destruction to come back again,
And I caused nothing but trouble.
I understand if you can't talk to me again,
And if you live by the rules of "it's over"
then I'm sure that that makes sense.
I will go down with this ship,
And I won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door.
I'm in love and always will be.
And when we meet,
Which I'm sure we will,
All that was there
Will be there still.
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue.
And you will think
That I've moved on.
- Dido, "White Flag"
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Are Your Eyes Watching God?
"Ships at a distance have every man's wish on board. For some they come in with the tide. For others they sail forever on the horizon, never out of sight, never landing until the Watcher turns his eyes away in resignation, his dreams mocked to death by Time. That is the life of men.
Now, women forget all those things they don't want to remember, and remember everything they don't want to forget. The dream is the truth. They act and do things accordingly." [1]
"So Janie waited a bloom time, and a green time and an orange time. But when the pollen again gilded the sun and sifted down on the world she began to stand around the gate and expect things. What things? She didn't know exactly. Her breath was gusty and short. She knew things that nobody had ever told her. For instance, the words of the trees and the wind. She often spoke to falling seeds and said, 'I hope you fall on soft ground,' because she had heard seeds saying that to each other as they passed. She knew the world was a stallion rolling in the blue pasture of ether. She knew that God tore down the old world every evening and built a new one by sun-up. It was wonderful to see it take form with the sun and emerge from the gray dust of its making. The familiar people and things had failed her so she hung over the gate and looked up the road towards way off. She knew now that marriage did not make love. Janie's first dream was dead, so she became a woman." [25]
"What was she losing so much time for? A feeling of sudden newness and change came over her. Janie hurried out of the front gate and turned south. Even if Joe was not ther waiting for her, the change was bound to do her good...
From now on until death she was going to have flower dust and springtime sprinkled over everything. A bee for her bloom. Her old thoughts were going to come in handy now, but new words would have to be made and said to fit them." [32]
"The burst of applause was cut short by Joe taking the floor himself." [43]
"'Man, whut you talkin' 'bout? Caution is de greatest thing in de world. If it wasn't for caution-'
'Show me somethin' dat caution ever made! Look whut nature took and done. Nature got so high in uh black hen she got tuh lay uh white egg. Now you tell me, how come, whut got intuh man dat he got tuh have hair round his mouth? Nature!'" [65]
"She couldn't make him look just like any other man to her. He looked like the love thoughts of women. He could be a bee to a blossom-a pear tree blossom in the spring. He seemed to be crushing scent out of the world with his footsteps. Crushing aromatic herbs with every step he took. Spices hung about him. He was a glace from God." [106]
"Janie learned what it felt like to be jealous." [136]
"The wind came back with triple fury, and put out the light for the last time. They sat in compary with the other in other shanties, their eyes straining against crude walls and their souls asking if He meant to measure their puny might against His. They seemed to be staring at the dark, but their eyes were watching God." [160]
"It was the meanest moment in eternity." [184]
"'Course, talkin' don't amount tuh uh hill uh beans when tuh can't do nothin' else... Pheoby, you got tuh go there tuh know there. Yo papa and yo mama and nobody else can't tell yuh and show yuh. Two things everybody's got tuh do fuh theyselves. They got tuh go tuh God, and they got tuh find out about livin' fuh theyselves." [192]
Now, women forget all those things they don't want to remember, and remember everything they don't want to forget. The dream is the truth. They act and do things accordingly." [1]
"So Janie waited a bloom time, and a green time and an orange time. But when the pollen again gilded the sun and sifted down on the world she began to stand around the gate and expect things. What things? She didn't know exactly. Her breath was gusty and short. She knew things that nobody had ever told her. For instance, the words of the trees and the wind. She often spoke to falling seeds and said, 'I hope you fall on soft ground,' because she had heard seeds saying that to each other as they passed. She knew the world was a stallion rolling in the blue pasture of ether. She knew that God tore down the old world every evening and built a new one by sun-up. It was wonderful to see it take form with the sun and emerge from the gray dust of its making. The familiar people and things had failed her so she hung over the gate and looked up the road towards way off. She knew now that marriage did not make love. Janie's first dream was dead, so she became a woman." [25]
"What was she losing so much time for? A feeling of sudden newness and change came over her. Janie hurried out of the front gate and turned south. Even if Joe was not ther waiting for her, the change was bound to do her good...
From now on until death she was going to have flower dust and springtime sprinkled over everything. A bee for her bloom. Her old thoughts were going to come in handy now, but new words would have to be made and said to fit them." [32]
"The burst of applause was cut short by Joe taking the floor himself." [43]
"'Man, whut you talkin' 'bout? Caution is de greatest thing in de world. If it wasn't for caution-'
'Show me somethin' dat caution ever made! Look whut nature took and done. Nature got so high in uh black hen she got tuh lay uh white egg. Now you tell me, how come, whut got intuh man dat he got tuh have hair round his mouth? Nature!'" [65]
"She couldn't make him look just like any other man to her. He looked like the love thoughts of women. He could be a bee to a blossom-a pear tree blossom in the spring. He seemed to be crushing scent out of the world with his footsteps. Crushing aromatic herbs with every step he took. Spices hung about him. He was a glace from God." [106]
"Janie learned what it felt like to be jealous." [136]
"The wind came back with triple fury, and put out the light for the last time. They sat in compary with the other in other shanties, their eyes straining against crude walls and their souls asking if He meant to measure their puny might against His. They seemed to be staring at the dark, but their eyes were watching God." [160]
"It was the meanest moment in eternity." [184]
"'Course, talkin' don't amount tuh uh hill uh beans when tuh can't do nothin' else... Pheoby, you got tuh go there tuh know there. Yo papa and yo mama and nobody else can't tell yuh and show yuh. Two things everybody's got tuh do fuh theyselves. They got tuh go tuh God, and they got tuh find out about livin' fuh theyselves." [192]
- Zora Neale Hurston, Their Eyes Were Watching God
Sunday, August 29, 2004
Miss Holiday Golightly, Traveling.
"I'll never get used to anything. Anybody that does, they might as well be dead." (19)
"No," she said slowly. "The blues are because you're getting fat or maybe it's been raining too long. You're sad, that's all. But the mean reds are horrible. You're afraid and you sweat like hell, but you don't know what you're afraid of. Except something bad is going to happen, only you don't know what it is. You've have that feeling?"
"Quite often. Some people call it angst." (40)
"Never love a wild thing, Mr. Bell," Holly advised him. "That was Doc's mistake. He was always lugging home wild things. A hawk with a hurt wing. One time it was a full grown bobcat with a broken leg. But you can't give your heart to a wild thing: the more you do, the stronger they get. Until they're strong enough to run into the woods. Or fly into a tree. Then the sky. That's how you'll end up, Mr. Bell. If you end let yourself love a wild thing. You'll just end up looking at the sky." (74)
"Anyway, home is where you feel at home. I'm still looking." (102)
"No," she said slowly. "The blues are because you're getting fat or maybe it's been raining too long. You're sad, that's all. But the mean reds are horrible. You're afraid and you sweat like hell, but you don't know what you're afraid of. Except something bad is going to happen, only you don't know what it is. You've have that feeling?"
"Quite often. Some people call it angst." (40)
"Never love a wild thing, Mr. Bell," Holly advised him. "That was Doc's mistake. He was always lugging home wild things. A hawk with a hurt wing. One time it was a full grown bobcat with a broken leg. But you can't give your heart to a wild thing: the more you do, the stronger they get. Until they're strong enough to run into the woods. Or fly into a tree. Then the sky. That's how you'll end up, Mr. Bell. If you end let yourself love a wild thing. You'll just end up looking at the sky." (74)
"Anyway, home is where you feel at home. I'm still looking." (102)
- Truman Capote, Breakfast at Tiffany's
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
Good advice.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought—
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought—
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
- Lewis Carroll, "Jaberwocky"
// posted by émilie @ 6:37 PM 
Will & Barbie.
Oh, in the merry month of May,
When all things were a-blooming
Sweet William came from the Western states,
And courted Barbara Allan.
But he took sick, and very sick
And he sent for Barbara Allan,
And all she said when she got there,
"Young man, you are a-dying."
"Oh yes, I'm sick, and I'm very sick,
And I think that death's upon me;
But one sweet kiss from Barbara's lips
Will save me from my dying."
"But don't you remember the other day
You were down in town a-drinking?
You drank your health to the ladies all around
And slighted Barbara Allan."
"Oh yes, I remember the other day
I was down in town a-drinking;
I drank my health to the ladies all 'round,
But my love to Barbara Allen."
He turned his face to the wall;
She turned her back upon him;
The very last word she heard him say,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
As she passed on trhough London town,
She heard some bells a-ringing,
And every bell, it seemed to say,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
She then passed on to the country road,
And heard some birds a-singing;
And every bird it seemed to say,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
She hadn't got more than a mile from town
When she saw his corpse a-coming;
"O bring him here, and ease him down,
And let me look upon him.
"Oh, take him away! Oh, take him away!
For I am sick and dying!
His death-cold features say to me,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
"O father, O father, go dig my grave,
And dig it long and narrow;
Sweet William died for me today;
I'll die for him tomorrow."
They buried them both in the old graveyard,
All side and side each other.
A red, red rose grew out of his grave,
And a green briar out of hers.
They grew and grew so very high
That they could grow no higher;
They lapped, they tied in a true-love-knot-
The rose ran 'round the briar.
When all things were a-blooming
Sweet William came from the Western states,
And courted Barbara Allan.
But he took sick, and very sick
And he sent for Barbara Allan,
And all she said when she got there,
"Young man, you are a-dying."
"Oh yes, I'm sick, and I'm very sick,
And I think that death's upon me;
But one sweet kiss from Barbara's lips
Will save me from my dying."
"But don't you remember the other day
You were down in town a-drinking?
You drank your health to the ladies all around
And slighted Barbara Allan."
"Oh yes, I remember the other day
I was down in town a-drinking;
I drank my health to the ladies all 'round,
But my love to Barbara Allen."
He turned his face to the wall;
She turned her back upon him;
The very last word she heard him say,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
As she passed on trhough London town,
She heard some bells a-ringing,
And every bell, it seemed to say,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
She then passed on to the country road,
And heard some birds a-singing;
And every bird it seemed to say,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
She hadn't got more than a mile from town
When she saw his corpse a-coming;
"O bring him here, and ease him down,
And let me look upon him.
"Oh, take him away! Oh, take him away!
For I am sick and dying!
His death-cold features say to me,
"Hard-hearted Barbara Allan."
"O father, O father, go dig my grave,
And dig it long and narrow;
Sweet William died for me today;
I'll die for him tomorrow."
They buried them both in the old graveyard,
All side and side each other.
A red, red rose grew out of his grave,
And a green briar out of hers.
They grew and grew so very high
That they could grow no higher;
They lapped, they tied in a true-love-knot-
The rose ran 'round the briar.
-Unknown, "Bonny Barbara Allan"
Thursday, March 18, 2004
Love Makes Us Act Like We Are Fools
"That doesn't make sense."
Mike smiled. "I guess you've never been in love with someone who's in love with someone else. You find yourself saying and doing stupid things just to get that person to look at you."
I looked away. [166]
Mike smiled. "I guess you've never been in love with someone who's in love with someone else. You find yourself saying and doing stupid things just to get that person to look at you."
I looked away. [166]
- Elizabeth Chandler - Dark Secrets: No Time to Die
Sunday, October 19, 2003
The Quest of the Golden Fleece: Medea's monologue
This was too much. The torrent of Medea's wrongs burst forth. "You come to me?" she said --
To me, of all the race of men?
Yet it is well you came.
For I shall ease the burden of my heart
If I can make your baseness manifest.
I saved you. Every man in Greece knows that.
The bulls, the dragon-men, the serpent warder of the Fleece,
I conquered them. I made you victor.
I held the light that saved you.
Father and home - I left them
For a strange country.
I overthrew your foes,
Contrived for Pelias the worst of deaths.
Now you forsake me.
Where shall I go? Back to my father's house?
To Pelias' daughters? I have become for you
The enemy of all.
Myself, I had no quarrel with them.
Oh, I have had in you
A loyal husband, to be admired of men,
An exile now, O God, O God.
No one to help. I am alone.
To me, of all the race of men?
Yet it is well you came.
For I shall ease the burden of my heart
If I can make your baseness manifest.
I saved you. Every man in Greece knows that.
The bulls, the dragon-men, the serpent warder of the Fleece,
I conquered them. I made you victor.
I held the light that saved you.
Father and home - I left them
For a strange country.
I overthrew your foes,
Contrived for Pelias the worst of deaths.
Now you forsake me.
Where shall I go? Back to my father's house?
To Pelias' daughters? I have become for you
The enemy of all.
Myself, I had no quarrel with them.
Oh, I have had in you
A loyal husband, to be admired of men,
An exile now, O God, O God.
No one to help. I am alone.
- Edith Hamilton, Mythology
Eight Brief Tales of Lovers: Orpheus and Eurydice
Orpheus sang,
O Gods who rule the dark and silent world,
To you all born of woman needs must come.
All lovely things at last go down to you.
Youa re the debtor who is always paid.
A little while we tarry up on earth.
Then we are yours forever and forever.
But I seek one who came to you too soon.
The bud was plucked befoer the flower bloomed.
I tried to bear my loss. I could not bear it.
Love was too strong a god. O King, you kno
If that old tale men tell is true, how once
The flowers saw the rape of Proserpine.
Then weave again for sweet Eurydice
Life's pattern that was taken from the loom
Too quickly. See, I ask a little thing.
Only that you will lend, not give, her to me.
She shall be yours when her years' span is full.
No one under the spell of his voice could refuse him anything. He
Drew iron tears down Pluto's cheek,
And made Hell grant what Love did seek.
O Gods who rule the dark and silent world,
To you all born of woman needs must come.
All lovely things at last go down to you.
Youa re the debtor who is always paid.
A little while we tarry up on earth.
Then we are yours forever and forever.
But I seek one who came to you too soon.
The bud was plucked befoer the flower bloomed.
I tried to bear my loss. I could not bear it.
Love was too strong a god. O King, you kno
If that old tale men tell is true, how once
The flowers saw the rape of Proserpine.
Then weave again for sweet Eurydice
Life's pattern that was taken from the loom
Too quickly. See, I ask a little thing.
Only that you will lend, not give, her to me.
She shall be yours when her years' span is full.
No one under the spell of his voice could refuse him anything. He
Drew iron tears down Pluto's cheek,
And made Hell grant what Love did seek.
- Edith Hamilton, Mythology
Tuesday, July 08, 2003
Perfection.
I’m tugging at my hair
I’m pulling at my clothes
I’m trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I’m staring at my feet
My checks are turning red
I’m searching for the words inside my head
I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you’re worth it
You’re worth it
Yeah
If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you... away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you
What’s on my mind
If ain’t coming out
We’re not going anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care
What’s wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I’ve got nothing to say
Yes I’m wishing my life away with these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you...away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
These things I’ll never say
I’m pulling at my clothes
I’m trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I’m staring at my feet
My checks are turning red
I’m searching for the words inside my head
I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you’re worth it
You’re worth it
Yeah
If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you... away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you
What’s on my mind
If ain’t coming out
We’re not going anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care
What’s wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I’ve got nothing to say
Yes I’m wishing my life away with these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you...away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
These things I’ll never say
- Avril Lavigne, "Things I'll Never Say"
// posted by émilie @ 9:58 PM
My Shadow
the rain is falling down
and im drawn in by the sound
of the voices in my head
as my knees hit on the ground
i can feel the tears are coming
so i get up and start running
but i know Im not alone
what's after me is stunning
i stumble and i trip
and the ground is wet i slip
but ive got to keep on going
ive got to get a grip
i know it's right behind me
but its too dark and I cant see
but if i cant find myself
it will never let me be
and im drawn in by the sound
of the voices in my head
as my knees hit on the ground
i can feel the tears are coming
so i get up and start running
but i know Im not alone
what's after me is stunning
i stumble and i trip
and the ground is wet i slip
but ive got to keep on going
ive got to get a grip
i know it's right behind me
but its too dark and I cant see
but if i cant find myself
it will never let me be
- emily's
The perfect summer.
Everybody would waste it all
to have a summer that they could call
a memory that's full of fun,
fucked up when it's all done.
to have a summer that they could call
a memory that's full of fun,
fucked up when it's all done.
- Blink 182, "Reckless Abandon"
Friday, July 04, 2003
Words to live by.
hey
don't write yourself off yet
it's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on
just try your best
try everything you can
and don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away
hey you know they're all the same
you know you're doing better on your own so don't buy in
live right now
just be yourself
it doesn't matter if that's good enough for someone else
it just takes some time
little girl, you're in the middle of the ride
everything everything will be just fine
everything everything will be all right
do your best
do everything you can
don't you worry what thier bitter hearts are going to say
don't write yourself off yet
it's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on
just try your best
try everything you can
and don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away
hey you know they're all the same
you know you're doing better on your own so don't buy in
live right now
just be yourself
it doesn't matter if that's good enough for someone else
it just takes some time
little girl, you're in the middle of the ride
everything everything will be just fine
everything everything will be all right
do your best
do everything you can
don't you worry what thier bitter hearts are going to say
- Jimmy Eat World, "The Middle"
first Entry.
Wow, Emily has once again signed up for something that
she doesn't need. Well, actually this might turn out to be
helpful, cause Im gonna post stuff on here, too. Such as:
poems, lyrics, book excerpts, or just anything else I want
on here, but that I don't want to waste space on my melo.
Hrmm.. There probably won't be many entries like this tho..
Maybe. Im not sure. Well, hope you like reading my stuff.
Mad Love,
she doesn't need. Well, actually this might turn out to be
helpful, cause Im gonna post stuff on here, too. Such as:
poems, lyrics, book excerpts, or just anything else I want
on here, but that I don't want to waste space on my melo.
Hrmm.. There probably won't be many entries like this tho..
Maybe. Im not sure. Well, hope you like reading my stuff.
Mad Love,
